On Taking Control of Your Life

I'm a big believer in personal responsibility.  When shit goes wrong in my life, I don't blame fate, I don't blame bad luck, I (generally) don't blame other people (although in the early stages of realizing things have gone off the rails, I will lash out - I don't think that's uncommon).   I know exactly where the blame lies. 

As Shakespeare said (he was this playwright back in the Days of Yore, and evidently a fairly smart guy):  "The fault ... lies not in our stars, but in ourselves."

My friend Schnozz is a brilliant (and drop-dead funny) writer who decided one day she wanted to do something out of the ordinary so she joined the Roller Derby.  (I am not making a word of this up).  The intense training (and constantly getting knocked on her ass) got her well outside her comfort zone, it challenged her physically and mentally, and it helped her realize some important truths.

In this entry, she writes articulately, honestly, and wisely about how becoming a roller girl helped her realize some important principles about personal responsibility.  I have read and re-read it, and I think this may be one of the most brilliant essays on taking charge of your life that I have ever stumbled on.  If, at age 80, we can look back and say we followed the ideals she so elegantly expresses, we may not have amassed great riches but we will have led happy, full, productive lives with no reason for regret.

Consider this call to action:

"If you ache, do it because you’re living, not because you’re dying, rusting from the inside out like an old pickup in some forgotten field. If you loathe something about yourself or your life, free yourself of it without acting as if you’re the only person on earth who has ever had to make drastic sacrifices to get what you want. We all choose. And we all pay. One way or another. If you’re stuck in a situation that could be changed, you’re not stuck at all, and I refuse to insult your capabilities by pitying you any longer than I already have. Of course, like any good rollergirl, I’d be happy to help you, but only after you stop bitching, pick up your feet, and try."

Go and read.  Please.  Yes, it's good for you.  But for once, it tastes great, too.

Comments

[Schnozz]

Awww ... thanks, Nils! :)

But I see right through all this flattery. You just don't want me to hurt you. (Flexes giant biceps.)

[Deneen]

Some cold hard truths there. And confirmed what I have long suspected-I am my own worst enemy. I have not because I just sit here waiting for the Fed-Ex truck to deliver me the life I was supposed to have.

[Susie]

Just from the little sample here, I know I will read and appreciate. From my own constantly evolving perspective, I will say I have a profoundly deepened appreciation for and belief in changing the things we can. Being faced with something that I (so far) have no power to change, makes me more determined than ever to do what I can, when and where I can.

[wordgirl]

On my over there right now.

[shari]

Worth reading. Thanks for the link!! And the think.