Who Loves Ya, Baby ...?

Through one of those things where you read a comment on a blog you love, and the comment has a link to it and you click on the link because hey, otherwise there is work to do and really, we can't have that, I found an essay by a blogger who calls herself Chicky Chicky Baby.  The post talks about bloggers who have decided to pack it in (and haven't we all felt like that at one time or another), and it has this little gem of an idea:

What has depressed me the most, however, is the idea that people are pulling out cardboard boxes and newspaper to pack it up and others are picking this time, when the person is saying 'See Ya Later', to tell the blogger how much they've loved their writing and that they're really going to miss them. Why do we wait until the end to tell other's how much we really enjoyed having them around? Why do we wait for that final post, or the one threatening to end it all, to say "No! Don't go! I love having you around! Your writing means something to me."?

Why don't we tell someone that we care about them, or dare I say "love" them, before they're walking out the door?

People who know me - and some of you know me well - know that I am very forthcoming with my appreciation.  It's a decision I made some years back, when I was feeling underappreciated: I resolved then to make sure people who I respect, enjoy, and yes, "love" are aware of how much they mean to me.

I'm relentless about it, and I have found it to be one of the most rewarding changes I have made in my life and my way of thinking.  It never fails to bring me joy to tell someone how much they add to my life.  It really is a gift I give to myself, and what's lovely is that it is always appreciated by those who I share it with.

Allison was at a slumber party recently with a bunch of students in her Education faculty, and they played a game where one by one, each of the people at the party would sit in a chair (sometimes, I'm sure, uncomfortably), and every other person in the room would point out one positive quality about the person in the hot seat.  It didn't have to be a big thing - one person told Allison "I love how you get excited to be sitting next to a person in class who you've never sat beside before".  That seemingly insignificant quality speaks to a larger facet of her personality that is utterly engaging and wonderful - her interest in other people and her joy in discovering new friends.

As I say, I make a point of privately telling people I care about them, so I don't need to do that here.  What I think might be fun, though, is every now and again (perhaps every Friday?) to pick out five people whose blogs I enjoy and tell them so.  In doing so, I hope to encourage you to go discover how terrific these people are.

My selections will be more or less random, so no fair sooking if you don't see your name this week - chances are it will be there next week.  Trust me - if you're on my blogroll, you're there because I like what you do and how you do it.  That said, I need to start somewhere ...

... and Doc Ern is as good a place as any.  Erin's posts are always filled with humour and life, and I adore reading about her adventures in birding.  She is a self-avowed "nerd" (even owning a shirt that reads "Talk nerdy to me") ... but I think that she's actually pretty cool.  Erin loves the outdoors and loves animals (this is starting to sound like her Playboy centrefold Profile, isn't it?) and spends her days in a lab where she is a research scientist.  So yeah ... nerd.  But definitely not the kind of nerd we used to have at my school..

Speaking of cool nerds, Kelly is about the coolest.  Her writing often takes my breath away - crisp images, clever references, and such a positive, healthy outlook on life and relationships and all things trivial and not.  I don't check every blog on my blogroll every day.  But hers, I do.  And I have never been disappointed.  Allison and I have both said "Doesn't she sound like somebody you could really be friends with?"  Allison is 22.  I'm ... not.  I think it says something about Kelly that we both think she'd be a good pal..

Also on my list of bloggers whose writing has never disappointed me is William.   When I need to laugh, that's where I go.  This is one very talented, very funny guy.  He writes about his relationships - with his wife and his kids and his brothers and parents -  in a very honest, open, and kind way and weaves in lovely, self-deprecating humour to make sure nobody gets hurt.

Speaking of honest writing - and for good measure, some pretty damn fine photography - I can't do this first piece without mentioning one of my oldest and dearest friends on the internet,  Laura.   Laura's writing - especially some of her stream-of-consciousness rambles - never fails to make me smile.  And she takes some killer pictures of the place she lives on the Gulf Coast of Florida and the shorebirds and animals she encounters.   Plus - smartest dog around.

And finally (for this week), go visit Wordgirl.  I don't read any better writing, online or in books, than she routinely - and, it seems, effortlessly - spills into her posts.  She is brilliant and funny and thoughtful and writes incisively and articulately about things that matter, and there is a very good reason she's been seconded to write a regular piece for a parenting blog called The Imperfect Parent.   She writes with sparkling wit and an elegance to which we should all aspire.

So there you are.  This week's Friday Five.  I think they're terrific, and I want them to know that and I want you to know that and go visit them and later on we can all gather on a hilltop and raise our Cokes in one hand and our candles in the other and it will be a big ol' love fest.  Or else go for a beer.

More next Friday, unless I forget.

Comments

[Katherine]

What a great idea! That was so nice. Thanks for all the links to the other blogs - I'll go check them out.

[William]

Nils,
Thank you. Just being mentioned in the same post as Kelly and Vitamin Sea and Doc Ern is a huge compliment and then coming from you, who I consider to be the GodFather of Blogging....well I am speechless.

Thanks.

[wordgirl]

What a wonderful idea. That'll be Monday's post over at my place. Of course, I can corroborate what you said about how you tell people how much you love and appreciate them. You're extremely generous with your praise. Your words of encouragement and support have made a huge difference in my blogging experience and I count you among the folk I desperately want to meet some day if only to hoist a beer and continue our talks. It's something to shoot for, if you ask me. And the feelings of love and admiration? Right back at you, Nils.

[platypus]

The Godfather of Blogging. You totally need that on a t-shirt for Christmas!

They're all great blogs, all of which I've started reading regularly because you sent me there, so thank you.

[marit]

Great idea Nilbo. I"ll have to check out some of your links.

[Bucky Four-Eyes]

You rock, Nilbo - this is a super idea. Mayhaps I'll steal it meself.

And yes - we should all totally have a drink together. A virtual one for now, a few real ones later on down the line. Who's driving?

[SaraSue]

Nils, this is so nice of you! I've always used your blog roll to find interesting reads and enjoy all mentioned, thank you! You're so dear!

[CircusKelli]

That's a great idea Nilbo! A couple of those I already read, but I'll be sure to check out the others.

[kalki]

Thank you for being relentless in your appreciation. It really does mean so much. The very first time you gave me a compliment, I was so honored because you're Nilbo and we all have so much respect for you. But the more I get to know you, the MORE honored I am by your kind comments. Because you're Nilbo, and I know you well enough now to truly respect you.

[Ern]

The Godfather of Blogging. I love it. Second (third/fourth/fifth?) it. And the t-shirt idea is also brilliant.

Thank you for the kind words. See, this is why you are a perfect Godfather. You are generous with the support and encouragement and love. And a damn fine writer yourself.

[Ortizzle]

A superb idea! Before last summer, I don't think I had read more than a few random blogs. Two car accidents in as many months (July & August) had me at home most of the time, with a lot of time on my hands, but in too much pain to do more than remain in a sitting position all day (and all night), so I spent a lot of time at the computer. Which is how I found Dooce (I guess a lot of people start there), and hence also found your blog. And it instantly became, and of course remains, one of my favorite places to stop by for a good read. And the best of company: most of the blogs I visit were picked off your blog roll! So it is good to be able to read these little vignettes that will surely lead to even more cozy corners of the Blogosphere.

Write on, Godfather. :-)

[Nils]

Honestly, people. I don't know whether to sing "Ah Feel Good!" and drop to a knee while someone drapes a cape over my shoulders ... or make you all an offer you can't refuse.

I consider you all my extended family ... and - you can repeat after me - "Never go against the family, Fredo. Never."

[Allie]

Don't you mean GRANDfather of blogging?

[Nils]

How many times do I have to tell you ... we do not mention the "G" word. EVER.

[platypus]

Nils Ling, Grand-daddy of Blog ... it has a certain ring to it! ;)

[SaraSue]

"Nils Ling, Godfather of Blog"

[Nils]

Not even close, people. I'm sure there are lots of snickers out there from people who have high traffic and A list blogs. I'm not rejecting the compliment, I'm not ungrateful ... I'm flattered, but count the average comments ... I love that you guys appreciate me this way, and quality always wins out over quantity. But it's just our lil circle.

I love the lil circle ... but .. it's just a lil circle.