("Hey, everybody, gather around! An old person is telling a story!" - Milhouse)
I have to admit, I'm not a big Rolling Stones fan. I was forced to make a choice, and I made it back in 1964, and I've stuck by it all these years.
I know. I'm old. Take yer best shot. Thank you. Can we move on? Good.
In 1964 I was ten years old (I'll pause as you go Start - Programs - Accessories - Calculator). To that point, music wasn't much a part of my life. My older sisters had their favourites - Lesley Gore (for you youngsters out there, she and her brother went on to write a lot of the music for the movie "Fame", including the title song, I think. You know, the one that goes "Baby, remember my name ... remember .. remember .. remember .. remember ..." "Who sang that, anyway?" "Dude, she asked you to do one thing.").; Johnny Crawford (who sang a song called "I'm Gonna Knock on Your Door" b/w ""Mr. Blue" - long before Garth Brooks - and also starred as the son in the TV series "The Rifleman" starring Chuck Connors and featuring a character named "Nils", which automatically made the show my personal favourite); Roy Orbison (I got nothin'. He wrote "Pretty Woman". Go invent your own trivia.)
But there was still no singer or group that spoke to me, until my sister brought home an album called "Meet the Beatles".
I was sick that winter, so I spent a lot of time hunkered down in front of my parents' Sylvania Combination TV (black and white, thank you) and Hi-Fi Monaural Record Player. I would get up with my five brothers and sisters, smirk as they left for school after breakfast, and then plonk myself down in front of that huge piece of furniture (no, really, I swear to God it was the size of a teacher's desk), put "Meet the Beatles" on the record changer, adjust the record changing arm so the player was in "repeat" mode ... and listen. All day. No, really. ALL DAY. The same record. Time after time after time.
I was at Cub Scouts the first Sunday night they played on Ed Sullivan, and I could have killed my father for how LONG he took to drive home that night. Ed Sullivan started at 8:00 and Cubs ended about 7:55, and it was only a damn one mile drive, but he would not hurry.
(It was, I see now, just his way of having some fun, tormenting his kid, and I'm glad I didn't do that kind of thing to my daughters. It was agony.)
We got home and I burst in the door, not even taking off my winter boots or jacket because already Ed was saying "And now, for you youngsters out there ..." and the screaming started and there they were and in the next two minutes my loyalties were forever carved in stone.
So when the Stones came out with "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction", there just wasn't room for them in my world. I didn't like the sound much - even if the song was alright. I thought Mick Jagger was ugly and Keith Richards looked skeevy (some things don't change), and as a whole, they looked like the kind of guys who would walk by you at school when you were having a drink from the water fountain and smack the back of your head so you'd chip a tooth and then all wander away, laughing nastily, stopping under the stairwell to look up the girls' skirts. Not my kind of people. So, not my kind of music.
But I succumbed to peer pressure, and bought the album "Aftermath" when it came out, and there were some good songs on it - "Paint It Black" and "Lady Jane" and "Under My Thumb" (if I've made a factual error and you want to write me to tell me that " ... "Under My Thumb" was actually on the album blahblahblah ..." please hesitate for a moment and consider that the machine has not yet been invented that could measure my indifference).
Anyway, over the past 40 - some years (Christ almighty) I've liked some of their music, but in that time they've also cranked out a fair amount of shite, which - other than the Double White album, which contains some pretty weird crap - the Beatles never did.
So when I heard the Stones would be playing a concert in Moncton, New Brunswick, about two hours away across the Northumberland Strait from me, I entertained the idea for oh, about a nanosecond before saying "Nah."
But I did feel kinda curious. So when my buddy Cyn got a gig working in the Rolling Stones dressing room before the concert, I couldn't wait to ask her for all the goods.
Read about her excellent adventures with Mick and the boys here. She's got a story that - even for a non-fan like me - is something to envy. And I love that I can say I've touched someone who has touched Mick Jagger. And didn't even get a chipped tooth out of the deal.
I'm a big Stones fan, but it's probably just because my dad played their albums all the time. I remember sneaking into his bathroom to read a Playboy that had a huge article on the ups and downs of the band that wouldn't die when I was in third grade. After that, I played "Some Girls" every day after school until even my Dad begged me to stop.
Posted by: jessica_deva | September 10, 2005 at 03:14 PM
I was never a Stones fan. I've loved the Beatles for years, but never the Stones. Maybe it's just that my older brother listened to Beatles and Beach Boys.
Posted by: Squirl | September 10, 2005 at 07:58 PM
LOL!! the best part for me was the end where she didn't know Maroon 5 and the singer got pissed. that was priceless, since *supposedly* they are the hottest thing since sliced bread right now.
Posted by: whfropera | September 10, 2005 at 10:55 PM
Yeah .. gotta confess, I'm with her. NO idea who Maroon 5 are. I've probably heard one of their songs on the radio, but for all I know they're a samba band.
Posted by: Nils | September 11, 2005 at 10:10 AM
Well...I AM a Stones fan.
All I have to say is, you people better never use the drinking fountain in front of me. ;)
Posted by: Bucky Four-Eyes | September 11, 2005 at 03:00 PM
I know better than to bend over with you in the vicinity, Bucky.
Posted by: Nils | September 11, 2005 at 05:12 PM
You ARE wise, Nilbo.
Two words: rolling pin.
Posted by: Bucky Four-Eyes | September 11, 2005 at 05:28 PM
I grew up hearing the Stones by default: my brother's were born back in early 1950something. They had long hair and used to drink weird juices from the Supernatural Juice Bar while listening to The Who or the Moody Blues, or the Stones. I wasn't into them, but I really liked THe Beatles.
Had a good laugh over her comment about Maroon 5, a big grin slid across my face when I read that one. The only reason I know who they are is because my kids listen to them every so often.
I still can't believe the old boys are still touring.
Posted by: Laura | September 12, 2005 at 09:05 AM
I laughed out loud twice, causing my husband to say, "What's so funny?" and then I had to read what was so funny *to* him and then he laughed.
1. Start-programs-accessories-calculator
2. The indifference machine.
HYSterical.
Posted by: suburban misfit | September 12, 2005 at 12:55 PM
Yet another thing we have in common.
I'm not a Rolling Stones Fan, and the Beatles are my favorite band.
I'm seeing Paul McCartney September 30th at Madison Square Garden!
Posted by: Torrie | September 12, 2005 at 01:27 PM
What sub-mis said. Exactly. #1 and #2 are like moments in a song that make one shiver with delight.
I'm with you on the Stones thing. I think I saw them once, but I can't remember for sure. Although some of my favourite songs are by them, I see them more as an massively promoted business with a huge and fervently loyal market base, one eager to buy their urine on e-Bay. (Oh sorry, that was someone else a little more current, but like you said about the machine ...)
I still admire them for lasting so long in an industry riddled with equal and better talent.
The P has spoken.
Posted by: peefer | September 12, 2005 at 01:29 PM
I guess I'm too young (HAHAHAHAHA!) to understand the whole concept of YOU MUST CHOOSE EITHER THE BEATLES OR THE STONES, NEVER BOTH!
Um, dude, it's like apples and oranges. The Beatles bein' Apples, of course.
It's like, sometimes I want classical music, sometimes I want snarling punk with little structure. Sometimes I'm in a Beatles mood, sometimes I'm in a Stones mood, sometimes I say fuck 'em both and play some John Lee Hooker.
I refuse to be pigeonholed.
Without lubricant.
Posted by: Bucky Four-Eyes | September 12, 2005 at 04:02 PM
Well, darlin', it was a different time. Kids today are choosing between Xtina and Britney, or between the Foo Fighters and Eminem. And sometimes the twain shall meet and sometimes it doesn't. Back then, we chose sides ... were you a Rolling Stones fan or a Beatles fan ... or were you REALLY a geek and went for the Dave Clark Five or Herman's Hermits?
We'd listen to both ... but there was always a preference. And while my record collection included all the above, plus some Jimi Hendrix and Cream and Mamas and Papas and, for God's sake, even The Hollies ... I was never really a Stones fan.
Posted by: Nils | September 12, 2005 at 07:01 PM
I'm with the apples/oranges crowd. Can't we all just get along? I don't wanna have to choose just one! I hate making decisions! Oops, I think that wasn't about the Beatles/Stones for a second there.
Posted by: Ern | September 12, 2005 at 07:06 PM
Did you ever have to make up your mind? Pick up on one, and leave the other behind? It's not always easy, and not always kind.
Posted by: Nils | September 12, 2005 at 08:43 PM