So, a bunch of us around the Ling household decided enough was too much and went on a diet.
I hate diets. Always have. I hate denying myself anything that I love, and that's pretty much all a diet is, at least to me. "If you enjoy it, spit it out." Almost nothing I regularly put down my aptly named pie-hole is on any common sense diet. I was on the Jabba the Hutt Food Plan - "Two Years to a Crane-Assisted Potty Break and Heart Attack".
As a result, I'd trained myself to rationalize my weight, whatever it might be.
"Well, I'm not a victim of Madison Avenue's idea of a perfect body," I'd say.
"Whatever your weight is, if you're comfortable with yourself, that's the important thing," I'd say.
"Just more of me to love," I'd say.
"Bite me arse, so I'm fat. You're ugly and stupid. I can lose weight," I'd say.
I'd say anything to avoid the reality of it, which was that I was "overweight", inching belt-buckle-hole by belt-buckle-hole towards "obese", and not happy about it. I hated how my clothes fit, I hated having to patronize shops like "Mr. Short 'n Fat", and I hated trying on my summer clothes after a winter in the cedar chest (them, not me) and discovering that cedar fumes have magical shrinking powers. And yeah, even at 50, with 26 years of marriage under my belt (as if anything would fit under my belt)!, I hated the fact that women's eyes slid past me and settled on more attractive men.
None of that, of course, was enough to overcome my love of Coca-Cola, and pizza, and french fries, and (God, this is a painful list to type) Farmer's Market Hungarian Garlic Sausages (for the hungary man), and hash browns and toast with my Bacon-and-egg McMuffins with two large orange juices and and and ...
... and I knew I was killing myself.
I put off going to the doctor because I knew he'd do a blood test and not only would my cholesterol levels be sky-high (a source of decreasing concern to the cardio community, given the most recent research - still a concern, but now outweighed(!) by other factors), but my blood sugar levels would be off the charts. I was the poster boy for incipient adult-onset diabetes.
I don't know what finally made me say "Enough is enough." It wasn't how I looked - I had more than enough rationalizations on hand for that. It wasn't how I felt, really - sure, I was puffing and my face would go red when I tied my shoes, but by and large I was feeling okay. It wasn't how my clothes fit - I love shopping.
Maybe it was all those things, plus my older brother being diagnosed with Type II diabetes. Whatever. I finally said "I guess I can try."
But then what? I wanted a diet that was reasonably easy to manage, had at least a few foods I could choke down, and would purge the damn sugar out of my system. After weeks of research, talking to some pretty smart people, and examining food list after food list, and consulting with the other two people in my household who wanted to shed some weight, I settled on the South Beach diet. It's essentially a modified Atkin's Diet, with less emphasis on low carbs and more on recognizing the difference between good carbs and bad ones.
I weighed in two weeks ago, at the start of the rigorous Phase One of the diet. People who know me are invariably shocked when I tell them what I weighed - I carry weight well. I tipped the scales (almost squashed them, actually) at 248 pounds. That's two-four-eight. Two pounds away from an eighth of a ton. The two women who joined me weighed in as well, and for good measure, they took good measures. Hips, tummies, thighs, whatnots. I did not measure anything.
Last night, after two weeks of the South Bitch plan (as we've named it), I weighed in again. 232 pounds. Two-Three-Two. 16 pounds in two weeks. The women lost 11 and 12 pounds respectively, and each carved two inches off her tummy and about that off each thigh as well. No word on the whatnots.
(I am well aware, by the way, that the first two weeks of any weight loss program yield results out of proportion to what happens in the weeks following. I expect to settle into losing somewhere around 2 - 3 pounds a week.)
The point of this is not to brag. Pretty much anybody could have done this, and many have. The point, I guess, is to say that it was not nearly as hard as I thought it would be. We had to come up with a new recipe for ketchup (which I love, and which is essentially like pouring sugar over whatever you're eating). I had to give up Coke, which hurt (you are advised to sell whatever shares you have in Coca-Cola before the full impact of my quitting is felt). But for a strict regimen, it wasn't so awful, and today - after two weeks - we get back a lot of the stuff we had to abandon in that initial purge.
No french fries, no orange juice, no refined flour products or potatoes or other foods that spit up their sugars into my bloodstream. I'm going to have to find my inner sweetness. It's there, waiting, virtually untapped.
But I can do this. By summer's end, I expect I'll be pretty close to what I should weigh. And when I get there, I intend to celebrate ... with a nice, tall rye and ... Diet Pepsi.
*sigh* No, it won't be the same.
But then ... neither will I.
after a few months on this diet, maybe a month from now, the day will come (and I promise you this) you'll help yourself to a nice, cold glass of pepsi, (hoping nobody notices) and a shot of rye, and something odd happens.
It won't taste the same.
In fact, you'll think it tastes too sweet.
and you'll realize you've lost your craving for the sugar.
I wish I could promise the same for the rye! I never lost my desire for rum and um, diet coke.
but the sugar cravings definetly go away. and at that point, you'll know it's really working. working. you'll probably be down a buncha pant sizes too.
and then we'll really toast ;)
Posted by: Laura | May 31, 2004 at 04:35 PM
Good going Nils! Laura is right about the cravings, and once you get used to regular exercise, even just a 20-30 minute walk after supper, your body and mind will start to crave the movement at that time of day. Make it as automatic as brushing your teeth, and you ALL will be amazed at how a bit of daily movement boosts the diet affects... it takes so little; just daily. Keep us posted on your successes.
Posted by: Kelly | June 01, 2004 at 10:16 PM
Well, thanks, although once again, this whole post wasn't to brag. I'm not above bragging, not at all, and in fact I'll do my share of bragging AND yours. But the point of this post was that I spent a long time dreading the diet ... backing away .. saying "Well, I'll start right after ...(whatever)". I was scared of what I'd have to give up and the work I'd have to do.
I'm a pretty picky eater, and as picky as I am there was still lots of room for stuff I could eat in the first two weeks. And now the diet is pretty close to unlimited, at least for me. Coke is gone, and the bad carbs. But so is my craving for them. The first week I would have killed for a french fry. Now .. well, they still smell mighty good, but I could walk past ...
Down 20 pounds as of today ... I did 18 holes tonight, and I gotta say .. the walking is a lot easier when I'm not carrying the equivalent of a golf bag around my gut ...
Posted by: Nils | June 01, 2004 at 10:47 PM
Good for you! You've convinced me. I do not think it's possible for me to give up Pepsi completely... it's really what motivates me to get through my mornings at work - realizing I can have the one Pepsi I allow myself at lunch. I only need to lose about 7 pounds to be at my ideal weight, so I'm thinking South Bitch it is. Good luck to you on your goals...
Posted by: Cranky Chick | June 02, 2004 at 09:15 PM
Ahh, to only need to lose seven pounds ... as opposed to what, 70?
Cranky, you'll lose the seven pounds easily in the first two weeks. But the problem with one Pepsi a day is that you need to retrain your body not to expect sugar delivered to it on a platter (so to speak).
Pepsi, Coke, starches, refined carbs all spit sugar straight into your bloodstream .. and when the sugar level starts to drop, the body begins pushing you to refill - like a crack addict coming down ... and our immediate reaction is to fight a sugar jones with ... well, sugar. So donuts make us hungrier for more donuts.
Ah, the things you learn when you become a new convert ...
Posted by: Nils | June 03, 2004 at 01:58 AM
You may have inspired me. Unlike you - because of a diabetic Dad - I am careful about ingredients, eat soy a lot, am not a big sugar fiend, exercise regularly and have decent blood levels. But (or rather "butt" perhaps) as you may know (though we have never met) I am called Big Al with reason. I am probably 270 lbs at 6 foot 4 and could drop 50. So I will forego bread etc for 2 weeks. Can you recommend a resource that does not include group meetings?
Posted by: Alan | June 03, 2004 at 11:29 AM
Actually, I recommend you buy "The South Beach Diet" by Arthur Agatston, M.D.. I say this not because the good doctor needs any more money, but because I think you're like me - you need to understand the "whys" of something before you embrace the principles.
The underlying concept behind the diet is explained clearly and concisely and the information is empowering - I now grocery shop with some clear principles in mind and know how the foods I'm buying are going to be used - or abused - by my body.
Pick a date - say, next Monday. Go shopping on Saturday, after reading the first three chapters. Resign yourself to two weeks of culinary boredom (but not hunger). And by the official start of summer, you'll have lost somewhere close to 20 pounds, given your size. Not a bad start. And more to the point, you'll be encouraged to go further ... and your body will have shaken its constant craving for Timbits.
You know - as I knew - that your lifestyle got you into this, and it happened over a lifetime. Relatively minor changes in your lifestyle can get you out of this - and it can happen before summer's over.
Buy the book. It's money well spent. In two weeks, you'll have recovered the investment by eschewing Tim Horton's seductive delights.
Posted by: Nils | June 03, 2004 at 04:00 PM
One of the lesser joys of being a lapsed but well read homebrewer is a very detailed understanding of the relationship between starches and sugars and digestion by both man and yeast. Yeast do not lie and can't be fooled by science so I may forego the text in favour of the list. I would be more inclined to get into the recipe books. Pleased you will be, also, to know that Guinness is fairly low carb, though G+Ts and Cinzano and soda may be more in line as well. Alas poor IPA, however.
Posted by: Alan | June 04, 2004 at 12:11 AM
The diet sounds like quite a task, however I do congratulate you in your successes. There is just one problem concerning this healthy initiative that I have found can affect the individuals associated with the dieter. It is the unfortunate fact that from time-to-time when a woman decides to go on this diet, her significant other feels obligated to go on it as well! Now, this is not only unfortunate because the significant other is about 6'2'' and only weighs only 3 easy payments of 57 pounds!(it's late and i'm watching the Ron Popeil infomercial). This guy obviously did not need to go on this diet-- but did anyway. This unfortunate decision took away about 2 weeks of quality drinking time with his buddies. What up with that? And to quote FG, "That's all I have to say about that." I'd say more, but I need the phone to call Ron. He says I have to call now!
Posted by: V-man | June 08, 2004 at 03:04 AM
Yeah yeah whatever. No one's going to mention Nils doing "18 holes" in one day? Stud!
Posted by: Jodi | June 12, 2004 at 08:44 PM
... and I never lost my balls ...
Posted by: Nils | June 13, 2004 at 11:18 PM
Sorry to come in so late Nils - just to say how impressed I am. For me - No weight loss with eating sensibly ( no formal diet) I hardly eat any sugar/glycemic carbs EXCEPT in its alcoholic form anyway. It is a huuuge task to cut back my evening half bottle of wine and a Scotch. My exercise regime is holding up well though- not just because I am forced into it but because my 7 month pregnancy has shrunk to only 3, I can tie my shoe laces and the women in my life all have heaped positive feedback onto me. My back is better and I can get off the loo without pushing with my hands.
Is it the drink that is holding me back? Hard to change this habit for me.
Evelyn Waugh's career as a staff officer came to a quick halt during the early part of the war when his General advised him to cut back on his drinking. "Do you mean that I have to give up a habit of a lifetime for one of your whims!" was his retort.
Posted by: Robert Paterson | June 14, 2004 at 07:03 AM
Good for you Nils,I'm also happy that you haven't lost your balls..... Crossing the 50 threshold brings things into perspective.Do you find it difficult to follow S/B when you're on the road???
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | July 06, 2004 at 04:12 PM
Not so much, Jim ... pretty much every big city restaurant has figured out that low or good carbs are a growing market, so there's lots of choice ... all I had to do was train myself to not notice the golden arches. And when I'm in a small town, I just limit my eating to eggs, veggie wraps, (or, in a pinch, whole wheat veggie sandwiches), or chicken caesar salads, all of which are varying degrees of great.
I'm still losing weight - down 35 now, but lots to go ... but I'm losing it more slowly as I re-introduce some of the foods that were verboten earlier. Sugars are pretty much gone - I no longer even have a hankering for them - and for a Coke-a-holic, that had a major impact.
If I continue to lose, fine .. if I plateau here for a while, that's OK, too ... I know I can flip to Phase One, lose a quick ten to 15 pounds, and get back on track.
My sister insists that the difference between people who are thin for life and people who are .. well, not ... is that a slim person, when faced with a tight waistline, will lose the weight .. where the rest of us will lose the pants and buy a larger size.
Well, last week I bought a 36 waist for the first time in 26 years, they fit perfectly, and I'll be damned if I go back to 38's.
Posted by: Nils | July 07, 2004 at 01:14 PM
I took up Nils challenge but in increasing exercise and not going so low carb. The gut is down two or three inches as a result but in the last few days I have lapsed into the pasta world again. Weight is a somewhat useless measurement for me (at least initially) as when I pick up soccer again after laying off I get the beef and never seem to actually drop on the scale too far. I am quite surprised how, with good sleeps and exercise, I have less energy all of a sudden. I am the last person to either diet or give a rodent's rump about how I look but this particular experience is telling. Back to the meat and veggies.
Best rediscovery is home made hummus. Get your morter and pestle. Smash the drained contents of a can of chick peas, add lots of garlic lemon and parsley and smash, add olive oil, smash more, add tihini (sesame paste). Aim for a consistency a bit firmer than cottage cheese. Scoop up with pita or celery sticks or inner romaine leaves. Add enough garlic to deter others. Add hot sauce to deter garlic lovers. Anyone left is a good candidate for friendship.
Posted by: Alan | July 08, 2004 at 10:00 AM
Nils
Wow down 35 lbs, good on ya! I often wonder where the weight goes.....As you know I've mostly been husky like the illustrations in the old Eaton's Catalogue that had slim, husky, and tall. When we met in high school you were definately in the slim category and you may be on your way back. Now if we can only figure a way to get our hair back......
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | July 08, 2004 at 12:57 PM
Ah, James, the hair is gone forever. But that's OK. To quote one of my favourite singers, Christine Lavin: "Everybody knows it's testosterone/That turns a bushy haired man into a chrome dome/But testosterone's what makes the women go "Oy!"/ I'll take a bald-headed man over a big haired boy ..."
Weighed in this morning - down 39 pounds ... ran into a friend I hadn't seen for a while at the Farmer's market, and she said "God, you've lost weight .."
I said "Yeah, close to 40 pounds."
She hesitated, put her hand on my arm, looked deep into my eyes with concern, and said "Um ... on purpose ...?"
I'm not sure, but I think this means I'm getting old ...
And Alan ... from what I could see, you were doing more watching soccer than playing ... easier to make the pounds fall away when you're not snuggled into an easy chair, throwing Ringalos at the screen and yelling "Hopa!" (smirk)
Posted by: Nils | July 10, 2004 at 02:05 PM
Economy of New Brunswick in Jeopardy; Coca-Cola May Be Forced into Bankruptcy.
Moncton, NB. Local Walmart manager, Rene Dupuis, commented today that there has been a serious decline in the purchase of canned cola products. "I don't know what happened," Mr. Dupuis stated, "but our sales of canned Coca Cola has dropped through the floor for the past two months." Customers of the Walmart, located at Champlain Place Mall, have noticed a conspicuous absence of one particular vehicle known to sport PEI license plates.
A local Coca-Cola bottler, Maritime Coke Bottlers, has recently filed bankruptcy papers which in turn has called into question the provincial budget recently announced by Premier Lord...
Posted by: Davey | July 20, 2004 at 03:11 PM
Hi Nils
Summer or (winter in MB) has come and gone.....how's the battle going? Haven't seen an update for a bit.....are you continuing to be a shadow of your former self?
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | September 02, 2004 at 01:10 PM
Sixty pounds down and counting, Jim ... it's been a crazy summer but now it's pretty much trickled away and I'll be back to blogging sometime in the next few days ....
Posted by: Nils | September 02, 2004 at 01:34 PM
Wholly weight loss Batman!! Good for you, do you mucho better. I bet you couldn't take a 60 pound weight for a walk......
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | September 03, 2004 at 12:23 PM
When I'm walking up the 14th fairway, usually I'm thinking "You know, this is much easier when I haven't been carrying the equivalent of two sets of clubs on my back for the whole round ..."
Posted by: Nils | September 04, 2004 at 12:50 AM
Wow I just saw your photo of the renewed Nils......
Very impressive!!!! It resembles the frame I met for the first time in the Avenue or Classics, it's a little foggy at the moment. I may have to give this south beach thing a try.....
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | September 22, 2004 at 07:05 PM
Swear to God, James, it works. I started in May, remember. I'm absolutely a convert. You'll lose 15 pounds in the first two weeks and by January you can be lighter than anybody's known you. And healthier, too. Without suffering. Just sayin'.
Posted by: Nils | September 22, 2004 at 07:20 PM
Hi Nils
Here's a question.....when you stopped the cokes cold turkey, how did you replace the caffine...or did you just fight through it......?
In my case if I dropped coffee, my head would pound for a couple of days for sure...
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | September 25, 2004 at 01:38 PM
Diet Pepsi did the trick for caffeine, althoug there were mild headaches in the first day or so. I just powered through them - I'd known they were coming, so I wasn't surprised and was able to push everything away. Not pleasant, but that was the absolute worst I went through, so it wasn't so bad.
Coming into the 'Peg in mid-Oct ... let's get together ...
Posted by: Nils | September 25, 2004 at 03:01 PM
Nils
Let's do that e-mail me at jfogg@mpsc.com and I can give you my res and cell numbers....
How about Rich Harden-11-6 now, we saw him pitch in Scottsdale at spring training with Russ and Sandra......he's a great kid.....
Jim
Posted by: Jim Fogg | September 26, 2004 at 01:50 PM