This morning, I got up at 8:30 to make breakfast for our three remaining guests. My wife's sisters and a brother-in-law were all that remained of a steady stream of guests that started Wednesday, July 5.
Since guests began arriving, first in a trickle but soon after in one huge clump, we have had, at our comfy little farm house, the following events:
2 medium-sized parties.
1 giant party with live music and full-on BBQ
2 sit-down dinners for 12 or more
1 buffet dinner for 12 or more
2 sit down dinners for 8
2 sit-down breakfasts
8 informal gatherings and at least that many "Let's just stop at our place for a beer and figure out what happens next ... "
Average number of houseguests on a given night: 4
Number of bottles of wine consumed: 49
Number of empty bottles of liquor to be recycled: 12
Number of cases of beer/coolers to be recycled: 19
Number of kegs of beer consumed: 2
Number of lobsters consumed: 55
Number of 5 pound bags of mussels consumed: 6
Number of bags of chips/snacks consumed: 24
Number of burgers slapped on the grille: 52
Number of hot dogs/sausages consumed: 35
Number of quarts of strawberries consumed: 9
It has been energizing and tiring, rewarding and frustrating, heart-warming and exasperating. I love both my family and my wife's family, and I adore our dear friends, but I think anybody reading this will understand that this morning, I was not saddened at the thought of finally having the house back and having nothing to do but clean in blissful silence.
So, you know, it wasn't one of the highlights of the week this morning at 9:30 when my sister-in-law checked their tickets and said "Oh, shit. We don't leave at 11:35! We leave at 9:35! We missed our goddamn flight!".
Give me a fair judge and a compassionate jury and no court in the country would convict me.
They finally got away late this morning (coincidentally and not ironically, thank you Alanis Morrisette, at 11:35). There is quiet in the land.
I want to reiterate that I do love my sisters-in-law. But I think even they would be unsurprised to hear that there was a certain degree of relief when they boarded their flight.
So, to add to the tally above:
Number of fresh new bumps in the crawl space: 0